Friday, 27 October 2017

Next, a measured, sensible and unbiased look at the week's main news - with just a splash of sarcasm

Now there's a slogan I can really get behind! If that was the Freudian Slip of the Week, this was the Oxymoron of the Week:

Common sense socialism? Snark! Thank goodness there's a Tory government in power:
Presumably the result of years of strong, stable leadership at the Home Office. I'm sure it would't have anything to do with the police losing their focus on the things that matter to the public who pay their wages - you know, silly things like being burgled or mugged or physically assaulted:

Sorry - my mistake. Still, I bet they're spending their time on stuff that matters even more to us than being burgled:

Oh, right. Still, at least our police won't be making fools of themselves by going in for a lot of silly, feelgood, virtue-signalling stunts, like their Swedish and Dutch equivalents:
Oh, sod it! I give up. Sometimes I think the country's going to the dogs. So does the BBC's John Simpson, apparently:
So, anti-Brexit, pro-illegal immigrants, and presumably jolly upset that some newspapers are pro-Brexit and not too keen on illegal immigrants - in other words, yet another BBC leftie! Oh, wait...
I don't blame John for being annoyed by assumption regarding his political leanings: after all, I know so many right-wingers who are anti-Brexit and who are utterly appalled at the thought of foreigners being deported. I suppose one answer might be for him to keep quiet about domestic political issues, which, given that he's the BBC World Affairs Editor, is probably what his contract stipulates. As for all the current viciousness in British public life - how true:
 Meanwhile, on a lighter note, entertainment news...
Of course she is! Purely because it's in the best interests of the child, and not because it will allow her to demonstrate how fabulously hip and non-judgmental she is. I can feel a Parent of the Year award in the offing. Speaking of which, the Chelsea couple who advertised for a nanny to raise their children in a gender-neutral fashion sound simply adorable:

 Choosing a gender? Why stop there? Why not let your children choose their race, their intelligence levels and their height while you're at it?

I'm getting tired of snotty, witless anti-Trumpery on social media - but every now and then...
I recommend you have a bucket within easy reach before reading this last tweet:


  1. Lord Chancellor Lord Irvine? What? Either you or the Daily Mail are back in the 90s. Or the last 20 years have yet to happen, which would be welcome. Things can only get better.

    1. Oops! Thank you for pointing out that I had used the wrong Daily Mail item. I had intended using it to say what a relief it is that things had changed so dramatically since the days of the Blair Terror, and to suggest that, given the police's long-standing reluctance to waste resources on catching burglars, we might as well decriminalise the act. But then I got bored - and promptly deleted the wrong one! I have put back the right cutting, not only to spare my blushes, but also to stop my wife packing me off to a Home for the Terminally Bewildered.

  2. Can I recommend a subscription to a journal known affectionately in our family as The Oxymoron Times?

  3. Mr Sarwar was probably watching this