...intensify your own enjoyment of the season by reflecting on the fact that, out there, thousands of mean-spirited, miserablist, leftard cockwombles are hating every single minute of it - and even if they're not, they're having to pretend to hate it. If that doesn't put you in the Christmas spirit - nothing will!
If you have any left-wing friends left after the Brexit referendum, make their Christmas complete by phoning them up on the day and bellowing "MERRY CHRISTMAS, LOSER!" down the line at them. I'm sure they'll see the funny side of it.
Apropos of nothing, but have the Austrians really just elected a president called Van der Bellend? Or have I got that wrong?
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