Friday, 14 August 2015

The world's angriest dwarf is back!

I am sure - absolutely positive, in fact - that I wrote about Ian Salter-Bromley, the spectacularly ill-tempered dwarf from Hull, who, annoyed that his kitchen fittings were eight inches too high for him to reach, protested by defecating in the lobby of his local council headquarters. But I can't find the story via my blog's "search" box, and I have no idea what tags I would have used to identify it. Anyway, the dirty little devil is back in the news after being tasered by police for impersonating a Dalek:

Ian Salter-Bromley, 55, stuck a sucker dart on his forehead and filled his mouth with dominoes before shouting: "Exterminate! Exterminate!" at two carers in his sheltered housing complex in Hull. 
Salter-Bromley, who is 4ft tall, had initially been "quite jolly" but his mood changed and he threatened to kill one of the members of staff. 
He returned to his flat and barricaded the door after they called the police and he was involved in a stand-off before he had to be Tasered twice, with police worried they would hit his colostomy bag.
You can read the full story on the Telegraph website, here.

Look, I know we shouldn't mock the afflicted and all that, but every story about Mr. Salter-Bromley sounds like an episode from a surreal sitcom: the details about the sucker dart, stuffing his mouth with dominoes, and the police being worried about puncturing his colostomy bag are the sort of thing only a comedy scriptwriter could come up with. I predict an announcement from Comedy Central or Channel 4 that they'll be screening the first series of Angry Dwarf by the end of the year, with a second series in development.

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