Wednesday, 10 June 2015

So farewell, James Last - and thanks for all those fabulously naff album covers

Severe water retention, presumably

Let's face it, anyone with the slightest musical taste would rather be stricken deaf than to have to listen to a James Last LP. But there was never any point in making fun of the charming rogue - he chose his course, stuck to it, and sold over 100 million LPs in the process. Hansi (his real name) claimed that he actually liked the music he produced. What's undoubtedly true is that he produced thousands of hours of recorded music for people who don't much like music - in much the same way as John Bishop does comedy for people without a detectable sense of humour. But he seemed a likeable chap, was ruthlessly professional, and when it came to his LP covers, there was always something almost heroic about their unremittingly cheesy awfulness. I suspect Hansi knew exactly what he was doing, and you have to admire him for that.

From his expression, not a big Polka fan
Must be a bit parky!
hallo Seemann!
Well, you wouldn't get away with it these days, that's for sure
No, James - not a clue. Where exactly are you?
Has anyone, anywhere, ever specifically been in the mood for trumpets?
No, this is definitely the dullest LP cover in history
A mouth-watering prospect
Indeed it is, James
Evidently not too keen on non-stop dancing either
What - you take drugs, kill chickens, and turn people into zombies?
Must have run out of crisps
Presumably for crimes against music
Germans suddenly appearing on a beach used to make people nervous
Let's end with this glorious multi-coloured monument to utter naffness:

 So long, Hansi. Your music sucked, but you were fun. 

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